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Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Working for a living for Scientology ... nope, not so much

Got pointed to a video of Tom Cruise spewing his pseudo-religion of
Scientology. Lovely stuff. Makes me wish I'd never read any science
fiction ever in my life. If it were cheap, I'd have electrodes implanted
in my brain to erase the "engrams" of knowing L Ron "All About the Money"
Hubbard from every braincell in my head, no matter how many die.

I was actually offered the job that Tom Cruise has with Scientology. Not
being a big celebrity with a large cash advance to offer, I'd actually
have to Work for a Living. I'd have been Management -- but since it's a
Church (excuse me while I gag), I might never get paid anything, and if I
didn't work, I could have anything and everything taken away from me.
Ideally. Worst case, well... Seen the movies about Jonestown?

I expect Tommie knows people who do that. I'd have been technically an
employee, however, since it's a Church with a capital Urch, I wouldn't get
paid for anything, and would essentially be a slave. I would be offered,
"free," their mind manipulation cultish stuff, and if it worked, it'd be
"free," and if it didn't work and life as an unpaid cult slave didn't
work, I'd have to pay them for the services they provided that did
absolutely nothing for me.

At the time, I was not only unemployed, I was also essentially homeless.
And I turned them down, because I thought Dianetics was every bit as bad
as L Ron Hubbard's science fiction, and much, much worse. And I've spent
40 years reading good science fiction. L Ron Hubbard's work barely
deserves the name.

Religion? It's not even writing. Dianetics doesn't even rise to the
level of the worst of science fiction -- and what, I'm supposed to
willingly enslave myself to these fans of sucky science fiction, and =pay
them= if everything they said was lies?

Tommy-boy had better have an accountant who has a sharp eye for theives,
and a lawyer who knows how to implement a non compos menti defence in a
civil suit, when they come to take the 25 cents they haven't already
stolen from him.

But I mean that in the nicest possible way. Love the movies, but WTF with
the phony religious crap? What part of accessory before and after the
fact don't you understand? Have you had a non-Scientologist doctor review
your medications? Might not be a bad plan.

Tom, love you dearly, and I hope you pull your head out of your butt
before the episode of "Where Are They Now?" where they show the cardboard
box you're living in at that point.

Unless you're making money as one of these thieving bastards. In which
case, when you get to hell, have the devil ram one up your ass on my

In the nicest possible way.

BTW, since I was an Odained Minister of the Church of the Desiderata (See the records of The Church of Universal Life), their offer was kinda beside the point, anyway.

Grizzly's Growls
The Life and Times of a Minor Local Celebrity
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